In one of our earlier posts, I spoke about our CL experiences. Those were the days when we were looking for the single woman - y'know - the unicorn. One time, an Indian couple (we're Indian too) responded back to our ad for a woman. Various other times, couples had responded, but we'd not shown interest. I wasn't ready yet to see her with another man I think.
This couple seemed kinda ok - and they had a hot tub, so they asked us to come over and soak and maybe there would be some girl play involved. We thought about it .. Funnily enough, neither they nor us had exchanged pictures or seen each other. We took a risk and went over.
They seemed to be a reasonable couple - a little pretentious ( they were all about eating at "classy" restaurants and "classy" lounge bars) for our taste, but given it was our first time, we were still unsure about what worked for us and what didn't. An interesting observation made by the other lady was that they never went out with Indian men in general because Indian men were too clingy. I'll come back to this observation later.
We spoke for a bit, had a couple of glasses of wine and then proceeded to the hot tub. They'd been nice enough to offer us some swim wear (as we'd headed there right from work). Once in the the hot-tub, inhibitions dissolved a little bit - the ladies were trying to decide which of them would go topless first. Some flirting ensued. A little later, both of the women were topless, and my wife was making out with the other guy. So, I move towards the other lady and we begin a make-out session ourselves.
As we made out, I did what came to me naturally. I tried to kiss her. And boom - no kissing on the mouth - she says. I had a hand on her breast and another in her pants and she was cool with that - but no kissing !! I was shocked - I mean.. talk of having your priorities backward. It's only later we realized that many couples have such rules - where they keep reserve certain acts for themselves. To us, it never made sense, because what we reserve for ourselves is the way we feel with each other.
Soon after, we headed up to their "play-room". Yes - these guys had a designated play room - with low beds and soft lighting and music! Wow ! By now, everyone is naked. My wife and me were on different couches - me with the other lady and my wife with him. This is where it started getting a little weird. Both of them (the other couple) seemed to have their attention on the other . And no, this wasn't them watching each other to see the other's pleasure. They were keeping an eye on each other !! The guy kept glancing over to me and his wife, to see what I was doing , so he could do the same !!! We weren't looking for penetrative acts, but he was making sure I didn't "penetrate" - because if I did, so could he ! And she was looking to make sure he wasn't kissing my wife on the mouth !
Funnily enough, we didn't really notice most of this during the act - it was more when the two of us were chatting about our experience that we both realized that we'd seen the same things and felt the same way. Anyways, after a while, we decided to call it a night and went on home. On the way home we decided we were not going to be seeing these guys again.. It was just a little to weird.
Now I'll go back to the observation made by his wife - that Indian men were clingy. Guess what happens a few days later. My wife gets a call from the hubby (let's call him S) . S calls her, asks her is she'd like to meet. My wife politely declines. Around this time, I went to India on a vacation (alone). During this time, he calls her again and again .. one time he tells her he has bought a convertible and would she like to go on a ride with him? He tries to friend her on facebook ! And his wife felt Indian men were clingy ... I wonder where she got that impression! Anyways, after a bit, me and my wife spoke about it and decide we won't be polite anymore. The next time he called, he was told - no way Jose!
Honestly, that experience soured us a bit -specifically with Indian couples ( yes, even though we are Indian). There just didn't seem to be a right level of trust or maturity between the two of them. Keeping an eye on each other, the desperate clinginess , the overall sense of unease we felt when we thought about them. I don't claim that all Indians are this way (obviously, we feel we are very different ;)) , and we've since met whites who are just as insecure or are using the idea of the "lifestyle" to prop up a dying relationship. But its also true that we are very unlikely to entertain other Indians in the future - there aren't that many of us that are non-monogamous and the risk of meeting another couple like them is way too high.
The only good that came of it was - we opened our mind to the possibility to meeting couples. It required me to make a leap - from a maturity perspective and I'm glad I did !
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